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| Tom's Mascot Melee - Week 4 |
| 09.30.04 (9:59 am) [edit] |
WEEK 4 (Last week: 7-7 - Season total: 26-23)
Bengals at Steelers - This is gonna be a tough one, but I think the steel worker will pull this one off with a hammer blow to the tiger's head. PICK: STEELERS
Colts at Jaguars - The Jaguar's got sharp claws and a wicked bite, but I say the Colt gets lucky and offs him with a swift hind kick. PICK: COLTS
Patriots at Bills - Buffalos don't have bullets. PICK: PATRIOTS
Jets at Dolphins - Dolphins don't have missiles, either. PICK: JETS
Giants at Packers - The worst that the packing worker can do is maybe tape the Giant's foot up. PICK: GIANTS
Raiders at Texans - As rough as the pirate is, he doesn't have much experience in dealing with cattle, so the bull's gonna trample all over him. PICK: TEXANS
Eagles at Bears - Eagles taste good with honey. So I've heard. PICK: BEARS
Redskins at Browns - The Brown dog's gonna get scalped. PICK: REDSKINS
Falcons at Panthers - There's sure been a lot of bird vs. cat matchups, seems a bit unfair, don't it... this one's no different, the Panther's feasting on Falcon. PICK: PANTHERS
Saints at Cardinals - Sure, St. Albert has skills with a sword, but the Cardinal is a very small target, and I say the Saint wears himself out trying to swipe at the bird. PICK: CARDINALS
Broncos at Buccaneers - Master of the sword, the Buccaneer will easily slice up the horse. PICK: BUCCANEERS
Titans at Chargers - A Dodge Charger is just a Hot Wheels toy to a Titan. PICK: TITANS
Rams at 49ers - It's horns vs. pickax. Edge goes to the golddigger. PICK: 49ERS
Chiefs at Ravens - The experienced Chief can shoot a single arrow and pluck the bird right out of the sky. PICK: CHIEFS
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| Tom's Mascot Melee - Week 3 |
| 09.23.04 (3:14 am) [edit] |
WEEK 3 (Last week: 10-6 - Season Total: 19-13)
Cardinals at Falcons - That cardinal just can't get a break. The falcon can nab it with no problem. PICK: FALCONS
Ravens at Bengals - Fierce cat vs. spooky bird. Tigers don't get freaked that easily, though. PICK: BENGALS
Bears at Vikings - A mighty Viking can easily stand up to a grizzly. PICK: VIKINGS
Browns at Giants - One Giant foot will turn the Brown dog into roadkill. PICK: GIANTS
Texans at Chiefs - If anyone knows how to stop a bull, it's a skilled Chief. PICK: CHIEFS
Jaguars at Titans - The cat don't stand a chance. PICK: TITANS
Saints at Rams - St. Albert's gonna make mutton chops out of the Ram... and get him a new wool sweater in the process. PICK: SAINTS
Eagles at Lions - Yet another cat vs. bird matchup... and the Lions don't fool around. PICK: LIONS
Steelers at Dolphins - Let's see... Steel workers are Union members, and Union members usually side with the Democrats, and the Democrats are all for saving dolphins, so maybe the steel worker will leave the dolphin alone?... NAAAAAAHHHHH. PICK: STEELERS
Chargers at Broncos - A horse vs. a muscle car. Notify the glue factory. PICK: CHARGERS
Packers at Colts - How good are packing workers at taming young horses? Well, I'll give them the benefit of a doubt. PICK: PACKERS
49ers at Seahawks - Eventually the miner's gonna blow that varmint out of the sky. PICK: 49ERS
Buccaneers at Raiders - PIRATE FIGHT! Hey, it's the rematch of Super Bowl 37, too! And this time I think the down-n-dirty Raider will have the edge over the relatively civilized Buccaneer. PICK: RAIDERS
Cowboys at Redskins - If you remember your American history, with the cowboys driving back the native tribes, well... history's gonna repeat itself here. PICK: COWBOYS
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| Tom's Mascot Melee - Week 2 |
| 09.18.04 (11:10 am) [edit] |
(Based on an original idea by Kelly Mohr)
WEEK 2 (Last week: 9-7 - Season total: 9-7)
Panthers at Chiefs - Panther, meet arrowhead. PICK: CHIEFS
Bears at Packers - That packing worker is mince meat. PICK: BEARS
Broncos at Jaguars - The only thing the Bronco could do is kick the Jaguar with its hind legs. And the Jaguar has a lot more going for him. Edge goes to the cat. PICK: JAGUARS
Texans at Lions - They're of equal strength and power... the lion's got the claws and the ferocious bite, and the bull's got the sharp horns and the charging strength. I say the bull gores the lion in mid-pounce. PICK: TEXANS
Colts at Titans - The colt gets squashed flat. PICK: TITANS
Steelers at Ravens - Quoth the Raven, "Shit! He's got a blowtorch!!!" PICK: STEELERS
49ers at Saints - St. Albert's sword vs. a prospector's pickax. The saint's gonna have his body armor, so he'll have the upper hand. PICK: SAINTS
Rams at Falcons - Although a Ram is bigger than a Falcon, he can't really charge at the bird. This'll end with the Falcon's sharp beak & claws finding their way to the Ram's throat. PICK: FALCONS
Redskins at Giants - It's gonna be like one of those Terry Gilliam animations for Monty Python, with the Redskin getting flattened by a giant foot. PICK: GIANTS
Seahawks at Buccaneers - With one swift blow the Buccaneer will slice the Seahawk in half, and in midair no less. PICK: BUCCANEERS
Bills at Raiders - It's gonna be a rough-n-tumble fight, but the Raider will persevere with his pistol and dagger. PICK: RAIDERS
Browns at Cowboys - If a Cowboy can rope a steer, a big brown dog will be no problem for him. PICK: COWBOYS
Patriots at Cardinals - A Cardinal will be just target practice to a Patriot, who'll pretend it's a redcoat. PICK: PATRIOTS
Jets at Chargers - The Dodge Charger can run, but it can't hide from the Jet's missile. PICK: JETS
Dolphins at Bengals - The Tiger's dining on seafood today. PICK: BENGALS
Vikings at Eagles - Eventually the Eagle will be a victim of the Viking's axe. PICK: VIKINGS
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| Tom's Mascot Melee - Week 1 |
| 09.11.04 (3:27 pm) [edit] |
Well, the new NFL football season starts this weekend, and like many other people in media across America, I'm gonna make some football picks of my own. Only this time the method in how I pick 'em will be quite different, and will be done in a manner that is solely for entertainment purposes and not to be taken seriously at all.
I will make my picks based on which mascot would win in a battle.
This is not my original idea, by the way - the credit all goes to a lady named Kelly, co-host of a local Dallas talk radio show called "The Pugs and Kelly Show". I just thought I'd bring her concept (with my own embellishments) to a different audience, since theirs only go as far as North Texas radios that can pick up the signal.
The cast of characters (you might want to save this page for future reference):
Arizona Cardinals - The red bird.
Atlanta Falcons - The bird of prey.
Baltimore Ravens - The bird of Poe's famed opus.
Buffalo Bills - They're named after Buffalo Bill Cody, but I'm gonna defer to the helmet logo and use the mighty buffalo itself.
Carolina Panthers - A black panther.
Chicago Bears - A grizzly bear.
Cincinnati Bengals - A bengal tiger.
Cleveland Browns - The temptation is there to go the toilet-humor route, but since they have their "Dawg Pound", I'm gonna go with a big brown dog.
Dallas Cowboys - A rough-n-rugged cattle driver skilled in the ways of the rope and the pistol.
Denver Broncos - A wild horse.
Detroit Lions - A proud, ferocious lion.
Green Bay Packers - The Packers got their name from their first sponsor, the Indian Packing Company. The mascot I'll use is a strong, skilled blue-collar engineer.
Houston Texans - I'm not gonna go the "second-rate cowboy" route here. Instead, like Buffalo, I'll just defer to the helmet logo and use a black bull.
Indianapolis Colts - The young wild horse, not the gun or the malt liquor.
Jacksonville Jaguars - The animal, not the car.
Kansas City Chiefs - An Indi-- sorry, NATIVE AMERICAN chief, a skilled veteran of tribal battle.
Miami Dolphins - A dolphin who may seem innocent, but could bite at small enemies while jumping through the air.
Minnesota Vikings - A noble viking from Norwegian folklore.
New England Patriots - The Revolutionary War soldier, not the missile.
New Orleans Saints - Representing the Saints will be St. Albert of Louvain, a 12th-century bishop who once was a knight.
New York Giants - A 1000-foot tall and ferocious being.
New York Jets - I'm gonna use a fighter jet instead of a passenger plane.
Oakland Raiders - A crude, scruffy pirate that plays dirty with a dagger or a pistol.
Philadelphia Eagles - A proud, mighty eagle. Not a bald eagle, though... can't be harming a national symbol, you know.
Pittsburgh Steelers - A pumped-up steel worker. Union member, too.
Saint Louis Rams - The animal, not the truck.
San Diego Chargers - Normally I'd go with the lightning bolt, but it would have an unfair advantage over everyone else. So I'm substituting the classic muscle car, the Dodge Charger (the type of car used for the General Lee in the "Dukes of Hazzard" TV show).
San Francisco 49ers - The typical raggedy gold digger from the Gold Rush days. Packs a shotgun and a mean pickax.
Seattle Seahawks - A seafaring bird of prey.
Tampa Bay Buccaneers - Unlike the Raider, the Buccaneer is a clean, well-kept, swashbuckling pirate who knows his way around a sword.
Tennessee Titans - Same size as the Giant, but with better weapons.
Washington Redskins - Another Native American warrior, though not as experienced as the Chief.
And now, on with the show...
WEEK 1 (Last week 0-0; Season total 0-0)
Indianapolis at New England - A patriot can easily tame a colt. PICK: PATRIOTS
Arizona at St. Louis - A Cardinal against a Ram... no contest. PICK: RAMS
Cincinnati at N.Y. Jets - A jet can fire a missile and turn a bengal tiger into fried meat with no problem. PICK: JETS
Jacksonville at Buffalo - A mighty buffalo vs. a cunning jaguar. I'd have to give the edge to the Jags on this one. PICK: JAGUARS
San Diego at Houston - Can a bull stand up to a Charger coming at him at top speed? I'd like to think so, but while a muscle car can sustain a bull's damage, that bull would die on the spot. PICK: CHARGERS
Seattle at New Orleans - The seahawk will eventually fall to a swift blow from St. Albert's sword. PICK: SAINTS
Baltimore at Cleveland - A raven can really bug a dog, but a killer bite easily overpowers a flimsy beak. PICK: BROWNS
Detroit at Chicago - Lions and bears, oh my! (You knew that one was coming... might as well get it over with in the first week.) I'm giving the edge to the grizzly here. PICK: BEARS
Oakland at Pittsburgh - Both are tough and skilled, but the raider is on the steel worker's turf. A swing of a big wrench or a steel beam and it's all over. PICK: STEELERS
Tampa Bay at Washington - A buccaneer may be good with a sword, but it's still no match for a Native American warrior's arrow. PICK: REDSKINS
Tennessee at Miami - A titan can just put his foot down and squash a dolphin. PICK: TITANS
Atlanta at San Francisco - Even an old coot like a gold miner can shoot down a falcon. PICK: 49ERS
Dallas at Minnesota - This could go either way... a Cowboy and a Viking square off. Both are rugged, both have a way with weapons. But I'll give the Cowboy the upper hand. PICK: COWBOYS
N.Y. Giants at Philadelphia - All the giant has to do is catch the eagle and crush it in his fist. PICK: GIANTS
Kansas City at Denver - Chiefs are masters at taming broncos. PICK: CHIEFS
Green Bay at Carolina - I don't think a packing worker can stand up to a ferocious panther. PICK: PANTHERS
Remember, this is strictly for entertainment purposes... so like David Letterman says, please... no wagering.
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| September 1994: The Big Move To Big D |
| 09.08.04 (3:22 am) [edit] |
Ten years ago today, one of the biggest milestones in my life was first set in motion: my move from Houston to Dallas. It all started with a phone call to my workplace confirming that I had been offered a position at a print company in the Dallas suburb of Addison, and the pay would be a significant improvement over what I was making at the moment. It would then be another sixteen days before I would be completely moved up there.
Up to this point, I had never undertaken a task this huge in my life. I had moved out of my parents' house just over two years ago, and I had been struggling to make it on my own without any monetary help from them. With the help of an extra part-time job checking groceries to supplement my graphic-artist income at Metro Networks, I was finally making enough money to cover all my expenses and then some. It was the fall of 1993, and my life in Houston was pretty much at its peak. I was active in my church young-adults group (as the officer in charge of the newsletter, no less), I was meeting new people and breathing new life into my dating scene, and to top it all off, I had a brand new TV - probably worth $400 at the time, but it was a broken discard from my workplace that turned out to be repairable for only $50. Life was good.
Then everything slowly and gradually took a turn for the worse. The presidency changed at the young adults group, and the new person was more restrictive in what I could put in the newsletter. My boss at Metro Networks wanted to change my job duties, with me doing less graphic design and print work. An alternative-music show I always listened to on a top-40 radio station was cancelled. My old friends and classmates were vanishing slowly but surely. And the Oilers got beat in the playoffs AGAIN. The Houston area was just not an interesting place anymore. So around February of 1994 I thought of making a change of scenery.
There were really only two other places in Texas that interested me at the time: Austin and Dallas. And in retrospect, I probably should've went for Austin back then, when housing was cheaper, instead of when I lived there in 1999 while rents were skyrocketing. But Dallas had more things that appealed to me: A better graphic arts job market; professional sports teams in all four of the various leagues; a better, less clogged freeway system; less humid weather; an alternative radio station, which was practically nonexistent in Houston at the time, save for Rice University's station; and family connections in my brother and sister-in-law, who moved there first in 1992. And most of all, Dallas offered me a chance to get out of the rut I was in and start my life over in new surroundings.
So I started by getting a "Dallas-Fort Worth Job Bank" book, getting a Sunday edition of the Dallas Morning News, printing out a new resume, and shooting it off to whoever was advertising or whoever was in the Job Bank book. Every graphic artist want ad in the Dallas Morning News (and there were a bunch of those ads back then) I shot off a resume to. I signed up with two temp agencies, one of which I subsequently had a fallout with (and they probably STILL don't want me back). And for probably the first time in my life on my own, I stockpiled money in my savings account.
In the meantime, I had lost my job at the supermarket, my service to the youth group was (voluntarily) ended, and I managed to find a new part-time job at a local Wendy's (the first company I ever worked for only six years ago). I went up to Dallas three times for job interviews: the first using vacation time, the second by faking an illness (either that or I made my head hurt somehow), and the third under the guise that I was attending the Lollapalooza show up there (which I did, actually - and got some interviews in during that trip).
Things looked bleak for me. My current job seemed to be on thin ice, and I could feel my termination was imminent. I took a gamble on my apartment by giving my month's notice to move out in late August. I started to make alternate plans, like looking at new apartments and interviewing at other companies in Houston and Galveston. I didn't know which way my life would turn if I didn't find something in Dallas.
Until the afternoon of Thursday, September 8th. That's when I got the call from a print shop in the Dallas suburb of Addison, telling me I got a job there, which paid me considerably more than I was making at my current job. It felt like an enormous weight was lifted off of me. I immediately turned in my notice at work, went back up to Dallas a couple more times to find an apartment, and started packing everything. I got my father to find me a decent car that could get me up to Dallas, as the current clunker I had seemed ready to fall apart on me.
Finally, on Saturday, September 23rd, with help from my family, everything was loaded up and was all moved that day to my new apartment waiting for me in Far North Dallas. The big move was complete. Looking back it doesn't seem much of a big deal now... especially since then I moved to Austin and back around the turn of the century. But ten years ago, I rarely ever ventured out of the Houston area, and I had never taken a road trip that long by myself. In 1994, my personal world suddenly got a whole lot bigger... and since then, Houston didn't seem so vast, not to mention my new home.
That job I took barely lasted over a year. And I've had my share of struggles up here as well. But I could see myself spending the rest of my life in this place. Dallas/Fort Worth, for the most part, has been good to me. (The housing and the gas prices can seem a little high at times, but that's about it.)
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